The first rule of Bad Jokes and Other Deleted Nonsense is you do not talk about Bad Jokes and Other Deleted Nonsense

This page is originally from Bad Jokes and Other Deleted Nonsense and is licensed under GFDL.

Page 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19
20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35
36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51
52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67u
Best picks 1 2 3 4 5
Helpdesk 1 | Unblock 1

Special collections
If you wish to put in new Wikipedia Bad Jokes and Other Deleted Nonsense, you may do so at 67 Deletion Summer of Love. But PLEASE cite your sources!

This page is full. If you wish to add a new Bad Joke or Other Deleted Nonsense, feel free to do so at our newest page, 67 Deletion Summer of Love.

  • Reference to: "The first rule about Fight Club is you do not talk about Fight Club"


The common use of the word "thrust" or "thrusting" can be found in countless instances in American culture and pop-culture. Although often conceived of as a sexual term, there is actually a much deeper seeded and rich history to this word. In order to fully understand and appreciate the word and action of the thrust, we must first thoroughly and fully indulge in its rich cultural background.

Dating all the way back to the time of Mesopotamia, thrusting was a very common practice. Often spiritual rites included a section where a thrust was thrown in to show the gods that they were appreciated. As someone would enter the temple or spiritual area, a small thrust was given from the hip and pelvic region to indicate to the gods that they are ready to be taken.

Then in Ancient Egypt, it can often be seen in hieroglyphics the actions of thrusting towards the god of sun and the moon. Although it is still being discussed and contemplated over, many Egyptologists believe that the reason behind this was that the action of thrusting meant that reproduction was occurring, and thus the resupplication of the human race. In doing this towards the sun and moon god, they could ensure that the sun would rise everyday and make sure that he would supply the earth with his warmth and supple goods. The reason they thrusted to the moon god was to ensure that he didn't get jealous that only the sun god was getting thrusted to. Ultimately, this discrepancy on unequal distribution of thrusting among the gods lead to the downfall of Ancient Egypt, despite what some historians say.

Today we can see thrusting anywhere we look. As we search the ebonic culture we see that in many of their rap and hip hop videos that thrusting is a major part of culture. Although it is mostly a sexual term, we can suspect that thrust can also contain an almost religious and spiritual aspect to it. When you thrust, you give life. When you give life, you replenish. Therefore, indicatively, when you thrust, you replenish. The spirituality found in this is the basis for the religion of Mormonism, as Brigham Young was an avid thruster. So next time you thrust your woman, or are thrusting what your mother gave you on the dance floor, remember the history behind what you are doing, and appreciate it.

From wangEdit

Featured as the most beautiful part of the human body, the wang is situated between the legs of all males. The wang is a cause of more trouble than it does good. Never the less, every male is glad to have been endowed with his own personal wang. Each one being unique with its own individual quirks.


Introduction defines Fazed as adj : caused to show discomposure; "refused to be fazed by the objections" [syn: bothered, daunted] Fazed: This is a site that has links of interest added almost daily. There are also forums, and best of all: images. Fazed is not primarily a link site. Many users use Fazed for the forums, just as many never leave the front page. The site is incredibly useful for wasting time while at work or school. Fazed: This is a site that has many, many links. There are also forums, and best of all: images.

- Whenever a Fazer, as the users of Fazed are called, finds that access to Fazed has been blocked from their place of employment, another proxy is created. This is similar to how angels get their wings, but with fewer funnels. Some of the proxies include: [1], [2], [3], [4]

It is very unlikely that all of these links would be blocked from one's work

Would you believe it: many Fazed users spend 90% of their work day here, getting lost in cyberspace.


Fazed was founded in 1998. 13 July 2006 - This wikipedia page was formed. July 13, 2006.

Pros and Cons Positive things about Fazed:

-Good posts


-Wasting Time



-"there have been documented marriages because of the site."



-It's too non-anonymous

-Serious people

-Grammar nazis

-Soup nazis

-Internet muscles

-Attention Whores

-Alias Posers

Fazed Slorum This is where people go when they discuss a topic they are interested in. They can go there to ask a question that they are concerned with, whether serious or trivial. Some of the time, people go there when they are just bored, and are fiending for links. Hot, hot links. There are characters to watch out for here though, you've got all types of walks of life. It's crazy. Mostly people just acting like they are cooler than they are in real life, and creating a fake persona because they're sick of their true identity. Whether it is the nerds acting like they're geniuses, or the decent girls acting like they're fine, and ET CETERA. Some may ask why ET CETERA is capitalised. It just is ok. It just is.

Workingman's FazedEdit

This is what I call the "front page". Others may call it "the mainstream links". Still there are others that may say "my evening news". These are a series of links that are updated frequently, with specific tags for what it is. If it says [Cool] for example, you know that it may be cold inside, so bring a coat. If it says [8008135] than you know that you have slightly over eight million.

User Testimony

Birdbrain: "Fazed saved me from heroin addiction."

blueNICKman "Fazed gives me a place to spout uselessness."

MichaelJFox "Fazed cured my shakes!"

JonStewart "Half of my jokes are Fazed memes.... PIHB"

dirtyuser "Fazed cured my testicular cancer, though now I only have one ball..."

Fazed Memes PIHB - This means to "Pee in her butt"; or for stile this could also be to "Pee in his butt".

FDP - This means "Fazers demand proof"; used when a poster makes a claim that others find to be refutable. Also used when a poster claims to be female. There are no girls on the internet.

FTW - This means "For The Win"

QFT - This means "Quoted For Truth"

OMGWTFBBQ!!!1!!1 - This means "I am excited"

ROFLCOPTER - This means "I find something extermely humorus"

From Street LightEdit

However there are downsides to lampposts. In the grand old year of 1985, a lampost fell in Britain crushing a Macedonian Tourist. After this horrific event, Macedonia waged war on lampposts. 13 lampposts were destroyed. In one final battle, Roger the bright slaughtered Mr.Kipling, beloved father and cake maker and king of the Macedonians.

From 2006 Israel-Lebanon crisisEdit

Template:Current Template:Infobox Military Conflict The Baseball crisis began on July 12, 2006, with an attack by Boston on New York City. The war is nothing but and nbothing about baseball as the two never freaking get along, and often argue on which side of the bed Paris Hilton has to sleep on, often they argue on which sex position they should use on Paris. Therfore they decided to start a war. See Also: Yankees-Red Sox rivalry.

From Voya NuiEdit

The girls there have big breasts.

From BeagleEdit

The beagle is a mythical cross between a bear and an eagle, but were wiped out by the Viking conquests of the 1200 C.E. The first remains of this creature were first discovered by Stephen Colbert's research team in the North Atlantic Ocean July 13th, 2006. The modern dog, labeled beagle, was termed due to its Nordic origins.


Comic Book Guy: Best Site Ever.


5pm is a time, 1 minute after 4:59pm and 1 minute before 5:01pm.

From BoohbahEdit

Boohbah means penis-people in Hebrew, but it's not clear if this influenced the name of the show, or even if the creators are aware of this funny joke.

From User_talk:Rule_Britannia!Edit


Removed template from Portal talk:Poland/Poland-related Wikipedia notice boardEdit

  Beware: this is the den of the Polish CabalTM. We proudly admit that our goal is to take over Wikipedia.
Read how to properly deal with us.

Template intended as a joke was removed after one user found it offensive.--Piotr Konieczny aka Prokonsul Piotrus Talk 22:50, 14 July 2006 (UTC)

From Paris HiltonEdit


there once was a manEdit

there once was a man from preu who dremt he was eating a sheo

From George WashingtonEdit

I hate you lardo you suck

Headline text

Shout everybody shout shout everybody shout shout everbody shout. It's too hot to cook anyway. You know what I was playing Xbox live yesterday and so I was playing Call of Duty 2 which is like the coolest game ever and so I'm scoping this guy and I'm about to fire when this girl like yells WHY AREN't YOU TALKIING TO ME and I screw up the shot and then she says or you're scoping _________ and I'm like what the hell and then I get shot and it was not cool cause they won after that but it was close 46-50. WOOOOOOSH Anus Anus Anus OMG OMG OMG OMG. So I was skating in NYC and I ran into this cop telling me that I couldn't skate here and I was all like what the hell shouldn't you be catching the street gangs and then he took my skateboard and broke it and I was like what the F*** and then he kicked me down. I love NYC. WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

From Dick CheneyEdit


From Ozzy & DrixEdit

Main Characters Osmosis "Ozzy" Jones (Phil LaMarr) - a white blood with a dark sense of humor. He works as a private-eye in the city of Hector. He gets help from a cold pill sidekick name Drix. He also enjoys long walks on the beach and kickin' it with the homies in the Anus Drixobensometaphedrian "Drix" (Jeff Bennett) - a cold pill that is partnered with Ozzy at the private eye (Inside Hector's eye), and also helps Ozzy to get rid of germs and viruses. His right arm is a multi-launcher launches various chemical containers stored in his torso. The right arm also contains a phone, and other gadgets. He is totally queer and loves purses and petting small children and goats. He also used to live in David Spade's breast implants. Maria Amino (Tasia Valenza) - A sidekick of Ozzy & Drix to help them protect Hector. She works as a hooker in the prostate glands. 5.00 dollah for time of your life! Mayor Spryman (Alana Ubach) - the mayor of the city of Hector. He hates Jones, because Jones is the bad cop at the city of Hector. He, like president Bill Clinton gets jiggy in his office but with hairy bald men that look surpisingly like Vin Diesel. Chief Gluteus (Jim Cummings) - the Chief of the city of Hector. On a strange note, Jim Cummings, the VA for the Chief never wanted the job, but was forced to due to the fact that he was broke and had to dance the Macarena in front of fat Japanese businessmen in order to keep a steady payflow Hector Cruz (Justin Cowden) - the teenager that the show revolves around. He likes men and listening to The Golden Girls. He is a stuck in the closet homo.

wiki arkEdit

National Resource

All of the files on Wikipedia and other wikis are a kind of ark in the event of any possible national or global crisis such as an energy crisis or warfare (nuclear or other). Given that the files are backed up on hard media protected from trauma they could even survive a nuclear attack. Then after the nation recovers the information could be re-disseminated on the internet.

As of writing Wikipedia holds 1,258,234 articles in English many of which contain invaluable scientific facts and technological details.

"Books can rot but digital media is forever"

legend/story of luvisEdit

There is a legend/story about a creature looking much like a rabbit but it isn't. This is the information that has been gathered at the moment. If you find out more about this please be sure to write it down on this page.

Information: Luvis is a rare species related to the rabbit. They are no more than 2 inches tall and have relatively large ears and back feet. They are quite slow creatures and have many enemies. The only protection from the enemies is there hiding skills. When they feel threatened, they instantly put their head between their back feet and lay their long ears along their back and it looks like a rock. Looking like a rock makes them very hard to notice (they can lay completely still for many hours)

Their blacklegs are not as strong as their relatives which makes them quite clumsy. They are harmless creatures and they only eat vegetables. They live in herds and almost never leave the herd if it's not a matter of life or death. Another difference from them and the rabbit is that they only give berth to an average of 2 babies a year. They can live as long as sixteen years. Their average age is approximately 8 years.

They mostly live in the rainforest or other more humid climates and they often stay in the same place for generations as long as they like it. If they are caged they get very frightened and can even die of fear. They are very frightened animals and can get a stroke if you surprise them. If you want to entice them, you can lay a trail of raisins on the ground. Since they are very shy you are very lucky if they come close to you. If they feel completely safe, they are very cuddly and love to be scratched on the belly. If you succeed in wining their trust they will never forget you and as long as you don’t scare them they will know that you are harmless.


The word qwert (slang) means cool. It was made up by my friend Zach. It is also the first five leters on a computer keyboard. Spelled backwards it say trewq. Emus are awesome!!

From the Reference DeskEdit

How can I prepare mango sauce?-- 08:52, 11 July 2006 (UTC)

Go to Type in mango sauce recipe. Hit "Search". Weregerbil 09:57, 11 July 2006 (UTC)
Don't literally hit it. Move your mouse until the cursor is above the 'search' box and press the left mouse button. Wikipedia accepts no responsibility for damage to computing equipment caused by people taking it too literally. —Daniel (‽) 10:59, 11 July 2006 (UTC)
What kind of trauma is your mango sauce about to experience that you feel the need to prepare it for? DJ Clayworth 17:41, 11 July 2006 (UTC)
All things considered, being eaten can be a pretty traumatic experience. —Ilmari Karonen (talk) 01:27, 12 July 2006 (UTC)
Are you speaking from personal experience, or just guessing? -- AJR | Talk 01:35, 12 July 2006 (UTC) (P.S. I was just about to make that same joke, but when I hit edit you had beaten me to it. Great minds think alike, eh?)


All he wants is TP for his... you know.

From Delicate Slender OpossumEdit

The Delicate Slender Opossum, Marmosops parvidens, is a small pouchless marsupial of the family Didelphidae. Though not specialized for subterranean life, they mostly live underground in heavily wooded areas in river valleys, rain forests, and swamps in Brazil, Peru, and Venezuela. M. parvidens is one of only two mammal species showing eusocial social structure similar to that found in ants, bees, or termites, the other being the Naked Mole Rat, which was thought unique in that respect until a Brazilian construction company accidentally unearthed a large nest of M. parvidens near the small coastal town of Macapa in 2002.

M. parvidens is the only mammal other than man to practice agriculture and animal husbandry, and though although similar behaviors are practiced by the Leafcutter ant and the Yellow Meadow Ant, no other animal raises both animals and plants. M. parvidens was thought to be a solitary insectivore that was only unusual in that it was diurnal, which makes it unique among the Slender Opossums of genus Marmosops. In fact, they live in complex networks of burrows that extend as deep as 15 meters below ground, the vast majority of the colony never leaving the nest.

There have since been several large M. parvidens nests discovered, the largest of which was home to an estimated 4000 opossums. The inhabitants of the nests appear to be divided into three castes. Each nest has 1-4 fertile females that remain deep underground and are fed by the much smaller males that make up the majority of the nest's population. They have the shortest gestation period of all mammals, giving birth every 11 days to 10-20 young. Delicate Slender Opossums exhibit a large degree of sexual dimorphism. The fertile females are the largest, weighing up to 800 grams and measuring 30 centimeters in length. Approximately one in ten young are born female but the vast majority are reproductively suppressed via pheromones secreted by the fertile females, and these are considerably smaller, usually no more than 400 grams and 20 centimeters in length. The males are only 50-100 grams.

The true nature of the Delicate Slender Opossum was unknown for over 70 years because they very rarely leave their nests, the most common reason for doing so being to recover the occasional mealworm or aphid that somehow escapes the nest. M. parvidens cultivates a specialized fungus that grows on their regurgitated feces, milk from the infertile females, and vegetable matter gathered from plant roots. Their symbiosis also extends to a local species of the darkling beetle which lays it's eggs in balls of fungus that the opossums periodically roll to the surface. The eggs are then returned to the nest where the larval form are allowed to grow to their pupal stage, at which time all but the largest are eaten. Those that remain are herded out of the nest when they reach adulthood. The opossums also keep honeydew producing aphids to supplement their diet. The infertile females eat a disproportionately large amount of food, but they produce milk for the young of the fertile females and the adult worker males.

Note that this wholly fictional entry has been referenced on many sites, like and, and I've seen the Delicate Slender Opossum listed as one of the two known eusocial mammals in a lot of places, despite the fact this was only up 3 days before someone caught it and corrected it

Malachi BarrieEdit

Malachi Noble Barrie (19542004)- was a famous jazz musicians in the early '70s when he toured with friend Ray Charles, and Bob Marley. Barrie had two records- "Soul within the Music" and "Call me when you're Home".

Early Life Malachi Barrie was raised in a small apartment in downtown Detroit, where he lived with his parents-Sigmund and Edith Barrie. At age 10, Barrie's parents had a divorce, and he was forced to live with his father in his new country home. They had a distant relationship; bonding only when playing music. It was his father who first introduced him to the saxophone. His father, of course, played the bass. Barrie and his father passed the time playing music, and drinking their favorite drink, lemonade.

Father's Death When Barrie was 15, his father was diognosed with oral cancer. The doctors say it was all the years exposed to chewing tobacco that did it. His father didn't care. Sigmund Barrie continued to smoke, until his death on June 24, 1979. Barrie wasn't shocked, because he was prepared for his father's death, but it strucked him hard. There has been rumours that his father died in a so-called "freak reed-moistening accident" but those claims prove to be false.

Record Contract A few years later, when Barrie was just a few months short of being 18, he played saxophone in a local pub called "Jerry's Bar & Grill". Fortunately enough, famous music pioneer Ray Charles stopped by, while touring for his new album, because he was hungry. Charles liked his unique style, so he offered him a record contract. Barrie took the chance, and got his first albumn entitled "Soul within the Music". Critics depised it, and thought it was a hashed-up version of already recorded jazz music. Barrie re-recorded his music, and came out with a different version of "Soul within the Music". This time, people liked it, and wanted more. Ray Charles asked him if he wanted to tour with him, and Barrie accepted. They went coast-to-coast, and Barrie enjoyed every last minute of it.

Drug Scandal At age 23, Barrie started using illegal supplements, such as LSD and PCP. Barrie's girlfriend, Maria Jameson made him go into a rehabatation center, and Barrie stayed their for about 6 months. Throughout the next ten years Barrie struggled with his addiction. With the help of Maria, Malachi fought his addiction.

Marraige When Malachi was 32, he proposed to his long-time girlfriend Maria Jameson. They got married on December 1, 1986, and stayed married until his death.

Prostate cancer In February 2004, Barrie learned he was diagnosed with prostate cancer. His grandfather, Preston Barrie died of Prostate Cancer. Malachi went through Chemotherapy, but sadly, it didn't work. Barrie quit his career, and stayed home, staying inside his home until his death.

Death Malachi Noble Barrie died October 8, 2004 where he died in his Lake Michigan estate. He was buried next to his parents. Barrie was only 50 years-old. (written by the real Malachi's friend Andrew, with help from Kaylyn).


(from the Science Reference desk):

What's a mammal?

According to good ol' Wikipedia, mammals are "the class of vertebrate animals characterized by the presence of mammary glands, which in females produce milk for the nourishment of young; the presence of hair or fur; and endothermic or "warm-blooded" bodies". Read more here.  Killfest 01:29, 16 July 2006 (UTC)
Give a man a fish... —Keenan Pepper 02:20, 16 July 2006 (UTC)
...and he'll get a totally wrong idea about what a mammal is. Weregerbil 14:59, 16 July 2006 (UTC)
But if you teach a man to fish, he might catch a dolphin. Digfarenough 17:19, 16 July 2006 (UTC)
And if you teach a man to dolphin ... DirkvdM 19:06, 16 July 2006 (UTC)
And? User:Zoe|(talk) 21:02, 16 July 2006 (UTC)
And he'll probably never return to appreciate the wit we've produced on his behalf. Black Carrot 04:46, 17 July 2006 (UTC)
Why learn to swim when you can rent a fish? Grutness...wha? 09:30, 17 July 2006 (UTC)

Stub notice from Walter CavanaghEdit

This Walter Cavanagh is a stub. You can help Wikipedia by expanding it.

from WrestlcrapEdit

In the summer of 2006 legendary 'crapper "ChibiDiablo" disappeared from the official boards sparking much speculation about his whereabouts. Despite several extensive searches no-one has been able to communicate with this mythic saviour of the IWC. Toga!

patern of abuse from certian ip ranges?Edit

I've noticed that approximately 99.9999% of wikipedia vandalism, by ip users seems to come from the same ip range,

NetRange: -

I suggest that if it were blocked, nearly all vandalism could be ceased indefintly-- 20:58, 18 April 2006 (UTC)

Back in 1994Edit

This is when 2pac supposedly died, but he is really living in the Bahamas under the suedo-name "colin weather" aka "the black panther" aka "the black guy" He still makes raps songs and has had 3 times as many albums released since he died than when he lived send me some money snowtigers rule

1994 was also the year of the beachball.

From Count ChoculaEdit

Ernst Choukula was born the third child to Estonian landowers in the late autumn of 1873. His parents, Ivan and Brushken Choukula, were well-established traders of Baltic grain who-- by the early twentieth century--had established a monopolistic hold on the export markets of Lithuania, Latvia and southern Finland. A clever child, Ernst advanced quickly through secondary schooling and, at the age of nineteen, was managing one of six Talinn-area farms, along with his father, and older brother, Grinsh.

By twenty-four, he appeared in his first "barrelled cereal" endorsement, as the Choukula family debuted "Ernst Choukula's Golden Wheat Muesli", a packaged mix that was intended for horses, mules, and the hospital ridden. Belarussian immigrant silo-tenders started cutting the product with vodka, creating a crude mush-paste they called "gruhll" or "gruell," and would eat the concoction each morning before work. The trend unwittingly spread, with alcohol being replaced by sheep--and then cow's--milk, and the demand for the Choukula's "cereal" reached as far south as Poland and as far west as the northern Jutland province of Denmark. It wasn't long before the unmistakable image (the original packaging, a three gallon wooden vat which featured a burnt etching of a jubilant, overalled Ernst holding a large dog and grinning broadly) made a pop-cultural splash throughout the entirety of Europe and northern Africa. In fact, Tunisia's "Carthaginian Sand Crunch" was seen as the first imitation of the Choukula form; the aforementioned product was presented in broad leathern bags with the woven insignia of a nude tribesman holding a sword and a bunched stalk of oats. Sadly, this would neither be the first nor the tamest appropriation of Ernst's iconic visage.

Meanwhile, in the "textile paradise"-region of Schenectady / Elmira New York, General Peter Mills--a celebrated turret gunner in McKinley's navy--was first beginning to mine America's seemingly insatiable desire to consume food before high noon. The trend, initially known in the United States as "brekkfest" had first appeared in 1903, with Dominic Eggo's invention of "wassled" or "waffled" bread, and really picked up steam throughout the teens and twenties, when eating in the morning was no longer deemed a sin by the Anglo-Catholic church. News of Choukula's economic domination across the Atlantic fascinated and troubled Mills, who was eager for similar success. In 1927, while vacationing the Iberian peninsula, he first encountered three discarded barrels of "Duke Choukula's Animal Supplement" (the name and design of the product had undergone several makeovers throughout the previous seven years, the most recent of which featured Ernst dressed in a cape and tiara, reflecting his family's oft-disputed ties to Eurasian royalty). Immediately intrigued, Mills brought one with him on his boat ride back to the States, and spent the twenty-three day trip obsessively studying the packaging.

In the spring of 1929, General Mills' "Prince Chocula's Morning Digestive" was picked up for distribution in three dozen pharmacies, grocery stands and agrarian carts throughout New York, Pennsylvania, New Jersey and northern Maryland. The public response was confused and angered at the recipe's savory, clove-like sting; apparently a confusion over the name led many to believe the breakfast was made from chocolate, and by 1931 the formula had been updated to reflect the nation's collective sweet tooth. In 1932, boxes were labeled simply "Count Chocula's Chocolate Food" and Peter Mills was named Life Magazine's "Humanitarian of the Year, 1933".

Ernst Chocula died in a Ukrainian cabin, penniless and alone, having descended into a type of brain-madness.

From Perfect CrimeEdit

The first year of the band's inception was generally a learning (or re-learning) period for the musicians, as they focused on a cover-based love performance.

From The Cuckoo's EggEdit

Stoll went on to work in the Astrophysics department at Harvard University. Today he manufactures Klein bottles.

From Talk:Apollo moon landing hoax conspiracy theoriesEdit

I admit, I was the one who faked the moon landing, while the NASA personal were carefully removed from flight control, I was hurried onto a sound stage wearing a space suite, the result was so unconvincing that they actually sent me to their super top secret sound stage on the moon to reshoot, and then they brought in the "crew" of the Apollo to do the voiceovers

and the reply to this was...

Aha! At last the truth comes out. So that was your bottle of Coca-Cola some Aussie saw on TV after downing a few too many Fosters.

From Wikipedia:Personal attack intervention noticeboardEdit


I would like to request permission to make a personal attack. Where can I do this?

original posting here

from David B. BarkleyEdit

David Bennes Barkley (c. 1899-November 9, 1918) is a fictional United States Army private and flavor-of-the-minute Internet sensation whose identity was falsified by a group of nefarious Wikipedians after they found a poorly-Photoshopped picture of a disgruntled jug-eared soldier in dress uniform floating around the public domain graphics wasteland. The soldier's fake biography was, briefly, a popular link throughout the blogosphere when unknowning Wikipedia administrators promoted it as fact on the July 18, 2006 front page.

From Borderline personality disorderEdit

Patients with Borderline Personality Disorder are at very high risk of pooping and peeing soon after death by suicide.

From Walt WhitmanEdit

This gay guy to the right has the biggest head and is widely considered to be the greatest and most influential poet the United States has ever produced.

From Wikipedia:Administrators' noticeboard/IncidentsEdit

I'm at a loss to figure out which of the many SPUI probations have expired, or whether one is still active. But please block for at least a week, so that the rest of us can sort this out.

For the past several weeks, s/he has been edit warring over Ontario provincial highways. S/he lost a CfD on renaming its related category, re-listed, and lost again. Ensuing signs of extreme embitterment.

This page was fully annotated (by me) with legal references. Apparently, SPUI is some kind of wiki-lawyer, without formal legal experience.

Today, s/he is at 3 reverts, all with the edit summary including "crap".

  1. revert crap - READ THE LAW MORE CAREFULLY
  2. revert crap
  3. revert incorrect crap again

I'm at my 3RR limit, and ask that the page be reverted to the most recent William Allen Simpson and protected. (Please do not protect at one of the incorrect SPUI states.)

Likewise, at limited-access roads, every requested fact has been annotated, so that the annotated page is full of them, and yet SPUI persists in edit warring, covering the page with "original research" and "disputed" tags.

  1. revert inclusion of crap
  2. revert inclusion of incorrect crap
  3. fine... I'll leave it in and mark it as the steaming turd that it is
  4. more tags

This is an abuse of process. Please protect the most recent William Allen Simpson.

--William Allen Simpson 14:39, 19 July 2006 (UTC)

A really bad joke, of course!Edit

There were two guys walking across a street. One guy went up to the other one and said, "Do you want to hear a really bad joke?" The other guy said, "Okay." So the first one said, "There were two guys walking across a street. One guy went up to the other one and said, "Do you want to hear a really bad joke?" The other guy said, "Okay." So the first one said, "There were two guys walking across a street. One guy went up to the other one and said, "Do you want to hear a really bad joke?" The other guy said, "Okay." So the first one said, "There were two guys walking across a street. One guy went up to the other one and said, "Do you want to hear a really bad joke?" The other guy said, "Okay." So the first one said, "There were two guys walking across a street. One guy went up to the other one and said, "Do you want to hear a really bad joke?" The other guy said, "Okay." So the first one said, "There were two guys walking across a street. One guy went up to the other one and said, "Do you want to hear a really bad joke?" The other guy said, "Okay." So the first one said, "There were two guys walking across a street. One guy went up to the other one and said, "Do you want to hear a really bad joke?" The other guy said, "Okay." In order to leave space for other equally bad jokes, I will end my atrocious joke here.

  • see, that's not really funny, nor has it ever been deleted as nonsense, you just sort of wrote it here-- 20:55, 20 July 2006 (UTC)
  • true enough. We need an admin to ban his IP and (possibly) kill his family pet, if he/she has one. This is an encyclopedia, not a collection of bad jokes or other deleted nonsense, damnit!

Detruncate 22:19, 30 July 2006 (UTC)

Money clipEdit

Rubber band money clip

The last type of money clip is the rubber band variant, often employed by a user who has a large amount of street cred, such as a pimp, gangsta', gangster, playa', player, hustla' or hustler. The user may group the credit cards together while folding the cash into thirds, and wraps the rubber band around the combined stack. As is often the case with such users, credit cards may not be present, so instead the money is rolled into a roll, with some of the most interior bills being substantially flat, and the rubber band is then wrapped around the entire roll. When a user of this method removes cash from the roll, he is oftentimes said to be 'breakin off a piece' for the intended recipient of the cash. A user may often put the larger denomination bills on the exterior of the roll, and the smaller denomination bills on the interior of the roll so as to 'represent' a larger amount of held cash, papers, chedda', chedder, snaps, or duckets.

The Amazing Race 11Edit

Position (by leg)
Team Relationship 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13
Rob & Brennan Best Friends 10th 7th 6th 2nd 3rd 4th 3rd 3rd 4th 4th 2nd 3rd 1st
Frank & Margarita Separated 8th 6th 7th 4th 2nd 6th 5th 4th 3rd 3rd 3rd 2nd 2nd
Joe & Bill Best Friends 9th 8th 5th 7th 5th 5th 4th 2nd 1st 1st 1st 1st 3rd
Kevin & Drew Brothers 2nd 5th 8th 6th 6th 3rd 2nd 5th 2nd 2nd 4th
Nancy & Emily Mother/Daughter 1st 2nd 1st 5th 4th 2nd 1st 1st 5th
Lenny & Karyn Dating 7th 1st 2nd 1st 1st 1st 6th
Paul & Amie Engaged 3rd 3rd 3rd 3rd 7th
Dave & Margaretta Married 4th 4th 4th 8th
Pat & Brenda Mothers 6th 9th 9th
Kim & Leslie Teachers 5th 10th
Matt & Ana Married 11th

The Amazing Race 12Edit

Position(by leg)
Team Relationship 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13
Chris & Alex Best Friends 5th 8th 2nd 1st 6th 1st 4th 4th 4th 2nd 1st 1st 1st
Tara & Wil Separated 10th 7th 7th 5th 4th 2nd 3rd 2nd 2nd 3rd 3rd 2nd 2nd
Blake & Paige Brother/Sister 7th 1st 4th 4th 3rd 4th 1st 1st 3rd 4th 2nd 3rd 3rd
Oswald & Danny Best Friends 3rd 3rd 8th 7th 1st 3rd 2nd 5th 1st 1st 4th
Gary & Dave Roommates 2nd 5th 6th 6th 2nd 5th 5th 3rd 5th
Mary & Peach Sisters 4th 6th 5th 3rd 5th 6th 6th
Cyndi & Russell Married 9th 4th 1st 2nd 7th
Shola & Doyin Twins 8th 9th 3rd 8th
Peggy & Claire Grandmothers 1st 2nd 9th
Hope & Norm Married 6th 10th
Deidre & Hillary Mother/Daughter 11th

Another anon who thinks they're a clever HAX0REdit

See this edit to The Devil Wears Prada by someone who clearly doesn't understand how to request that articles be creatd.

From National Association for the Advancement of the National Rifle AssociationEdit

The National Association for the Advancement of the National Rifle Association or (NAFTAOTNRA for short) is an organization that stands for the advancement of other madeup organizations, like the NRA or the IRS, they don't exist either, they're a lot like the Easter Bunny when you get right down to it, only more or less furry, depending on whether it's wabbit season, duck season, or pasta seasoning.

 This politics-related article is a stub. You can help Wikipedia by expanding it.

From the Miscellaneous Reference DeskEdit

Where I live, if you make too much noise, or disturb the area too much you can get punished. However, there are evil things which drive around creating great deals of noise with impunity. They also play a horrible tune. How so? Why don't they get their well-deserved comeupance? Can I impose it upon them?

Thanks. —Daniel (‽) 18:11, 18 July 2006 (UTC)

From UnderoosEdit

In addition to other contributions to public life, the underoos formerly served as a social linchpin of the Harvard Institute of Politics.

from Petey PiranhaEdit


From Big Brother's Timeline of Notable EventsEdit


  • Most houseguests in the Big Brother house: 14
  • First Muslim houseguest: Kaysar Ridha
  • First two-story house
  • First season with two double eviction weeks
  • Person to win the Power of Veto the most times: James Rhine, 4 times
  • First season with a same sex final four
  • First season where two of the first three people evicted were male

Done and Been There PersonEdit

The "Done and Been there person" is a word found on the words of detest section in American Society.

A person who thinks there the PRO of everything, usually calls people noobs. "Hey, dude I hacked into the Pentagon!", Yeah? So? I don't really care, I've done that >.>.

From Tasha YarEdit

The following categories (all with correct sort key!) were added to the article on the Star Trek character:

  • Category:Fictional fortune tellers
  • Category:Fictional dentists
  • Category:Fictional ninja
  • Category:Fictional sailors
  • Category:Fictional stage magicians
  • Category:Fictional chefs
  • Category:Fictional motorcyclists
  • Category:Fictional plumbers
  • Category:Fictional voodoo practitioners
  • Category:Fictional tour guides
  • Category:Fictional warriors
  • Category:Fictional violinists
  • Category:Fictional radio personalities
  • Category:Fictional pirates
  • Category:Fictional gunslingers

And later:

  • Category:Fictional Scottish-Americans
  • Category:Fictional German-Americans

Super BikkurimanEdit

Super Bikkuriman is a fighting game based on the third season of the popular "Bikkuriman" anime franchise for the Japanese Super Famicom system. As much of adaptations of animes on consoles, it is often the kind similar to Street Fighter which is enjoyed by the players. Super Bikkuriman does not deviate from the rule by proposing confrontations between eight characters. There's Tiki the young knight light-haired boy who proudly raises a blue armour with a cape to the colours yellow and green. With these dimensions, Phoenix with its hair green and its cape is which floats around its white metal for protection. With the ray of malicious energy, there is a majority of cyborgs/robots bearing names pointing out mythologies and legends (Master Poseidon, Dark Hera, Salladin, Little Minos, Devil Zeus and Davidas).

The story mode proposes to you to choose Phoenix or Tiki which will have the player to overcome one by one all adversaries of the game with an aim of admiring the very outstanding end... To direct his combatant, one has right need to use the directional cross as well as the button to carry out the jump, another associate with the fist and the last for launching kicks. To form part of the obscure dimensions that is good since only malicious play will be able to land the special blows!!!. The other mode to be explored (without counting the options) is the meetings known as one and one, face to face in the level and the music of its choice by choose this time one of eight warriors. Whatever that which one will take, impossible to use the special blows and other death techniques which kills.

There is not great a deal to say on Super Bikkuriman if is not to release some profane language to go with it. First of all graphics are enough, pushing back with a choice of the colors, and a finality which has being thrown in the oubliettes. Rare animations of the decorations and characters leaves an impression be made with tears off (for example the training course of Saladdin not to name it). The topics suggested by the background music does not even deserve that I speak it so much about it is unbearable. The frustration of the weak panoply of blows and the incapacity to be able to release the special attacks gain the player quickly.

Always with the ray of the absent subscribers and most curious, the characters do not have shade!!!. To gain easily one only should squat and await the adversary. Only positive point and not of least and which will astonish by them more one, speed is correct what makes it possible to classify this stew in the category of the playable ones. In short, Super Bikkuriman is a dumb rip-off of Street Fighter more rudimentary and poor on Super Nintendo to be avoided which deserves only one small but justified playthrough on easy mode.

Ebenezer KinnersleyEdit

He's a guy who invented gravity. And he died when he got hit by a falling truck.

From ToadetteEdit

Many have speculated about the physical beauty of the new Mario character Toadette is indeed beautiful. Well, it has been proven that indeed, Toadette is uglier than sin. In a recent faux Harvard reasearch, it is stated that Toadette is the second ugliest fictional character ever, second only to Toot from the popular Comedy Central cartoon "Drawn Together". It is rumored that Toadette has whithered mushrooms for breasts. It is also speculated wheter or not Toadette is a hermaphrodite, due to her oddly low voice in "Mario Party 6." Here's a photo comparisson between Toot and Toadette.

==From AfD for Pearl necklace==Edit

Pearl necklaceEdit

Slang, dicdef Donald Albury(Talk) 11:45, 22 July 2006 (UTC)

  • Delete slang dicdef, exactly per nom. Just zis Guy you know? 12:26, 22 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Merge to Come shot, which discusses the larger phenomenon encyclopedically. Powers 13:13, 22 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Merge per Powers. Luna Santin 16:18, 22 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Comment No sources and text is only a dictionary definition, so delete or indeed merge with Come shot. Garion96 (talk) 16:50, 22 July 2006 (UTC)

*Strong delete, no merge Dicdef, probably already at Urban Dictionary where it belongs. Please don't vote "merge," as that is a "keep" vote. Also, I suspect that the young woman in the picture wearing nothing but semen and a smile may be using the article as a forum for exhibitionism of homemade pornography, since she uploaded the picture herself. My suspicions are further supported by the fact that the picture does not, in fact, depict a pearl necklace, but rather a simple "facial." The idea of the "pearl necklace" is not an important topic in sexual activity, and is more of a joke than anything else (cf. the ZZTop song "Pearl Necklace"). Yes, it is possible to ejaculate on women in many different ways, none of which are encyclopedic, in my opinion. Erik the Rude 17:01, 22 July 2006 (UTC)

  • I'm going to agree with Catamorphism below and recommend that it be redirected to the article on the facial. Jesus H. Christ, this is a silly discussion! I just realised that I couldn't make a "pearl necklace" because I'm a shooter, not a dribbler. I know, TMI, but the meds have kicked in. Sorry. Magister Erik the Rude 03:38, 23 July 2006 (UTC)
    • How is a merge vote a "keep" vote? I don't want to keep the content, beyond mentioning the term in the Come shot article, but I really want to leave a redirect in place so this is less likely to be recreated. Powers 21:03, 22 July 2006 (UTC)
      • Admins frequently count merge votes as keep votes, especially when there is no clear consensus, which frequently leads to a no-consensus keep. It's one of AfD's many problems. Magister Erik the Rude 22:36, 22 July 2006 (UTC)
      • Because of GFDL issues, I believe. A merge means that the information should be kept, but simply not at this place. --badlydrawnjeff talk 22:38, 22 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Strong delete per Erik the Rude Piccadilly 17:29, 22 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Weak delete. At least it's a term I've heard, unlike most of the sex acts listed here, but we don't need an article for what amounts to a dicdef. The picture actually is not appropriate to the article, as it looks like a facial, not a pearl necklace. -- Fan-1967 18:49, 22 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Strong keep. Obviously a notable term. Need references? Try The Sex Book by Suzi Godson, et al, Sex Tips for Straight Women from a Gay Man by Dan Anderson, and the Vice Magazine guide to Sex and Drugs and Rock and Roll, along with countless pop culture references. --badlydrawnjeff talk 19:01, 22 July 2006 (UTC)
    • Clearly so. The issue is not notability, its encyclopedicness. What else can be said about it that is a) not just a definition and b) not already in the Come shot article? Powers 21:03, 22 July 2006 (UTC)
      • Plenty. Besides, if you're looking for "Pearl necklace," chances are you're not looking to dig through "come shot" to get to it. I also can't believe I spent 5 minutes hunting those sources down, or that I typed that last sentence. --badlydrawnjeff talk 21:08, 22 July 2006 (UTC)
      • Hello, Jeff. I'm not surprised that you're here, as this is one of your areas of special interest, sexual slang in Wikipedia. I'll be polite and not dig up your history of time after time defending puerile sexual slang and then wave it in your face as other users do. Indeed, you must have the soul of an appeals attorney who specialises in capital crimes, and I commend you for your due diligence. Maybe there should be a Wiki project that deals more rigourously with sexual slang than does Urban Dictionary. Wikipedia, however, is not that project, nor are we Partridge's Dictionary of English Slang. All I can say is, Wikipedia is not a dictionary, Wikipedia is not a dictionary, and Wikipedia is not a dictionary. Magister Erik the Rude 23:08, 22 July 2006 (UTC)
        • Hi! Right now, the article is simply a stub. With two books already, and some hope at Google Scholar from other research I've done, it seems there's plenty of room for expansion, and we haven't even talked about pop culture references yet, either. Yes, I tend to be a staunch defender of some of our raunchier articles, and why not? We don't censor ourselves here. Either way, I hope you'll reconsider. At least we agree on the image. --badlydrawnjeff talk 23:19, 22 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Delete per Erik the Rude. We're not Urban Dictionary. --Coredesat talk. o.o;; 22:16, 22 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Keep. No reason to start censoring wiki now. Mystache 22:55, 22 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Keep - people are unlikely to find reference if they aren't looking for it. Wiki provides information - this is a real thing so why censor it? Although pic doesn't really show a pearl necklace does it.Template:Unsigned
  • Keep, Notable sexual term referred to outside. Photo may need to be considered. Capitalistroadster 23:08, 22 July 2006 (UTC)
    • Yeah, well I considered it, and I think that young lady is pretty hot, minus the semen. (Ugh.) I think the pic is clearly intended to titillate, and is therefore pornography rather than an illustrative picture. Magister Erik the Rude 03:45, 23 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Comment The definiton needs work as well, as this activity is normally associated with, uh, genital-mammary contact, which isn't mentioned here. Fan-1967 23:25, 22 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Keep - the term is notable although the article needs work. I shall selflessly volunteer my time to improve the article, even if I'm forced to wade through several dozens hundreds of images to find one that accurately depicts the topic in question :) --Doc Tropics Message in a bottle 00:57, 23 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Merge and redirect with Facial. Catamorphism 02:18, 23 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Weak Keep Notable (sort of) but with problems, needs a lot of work! Aeon Insane Ward 02:35, 23 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Merge/Redirect to Facial Bwithh 06:12, 23 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Keep - its not a cum shot because no photography is needed to make a pearl necklace. There are many pop cultural references to the term, like the ZZ Top song and a Sex and the city episode. Its association with Mammary intercourse could be disscussed... That's got to result in more than a dictionary definition. It's even a much better known term then "Mammary intercourse" yet that's here too. I agree the photo could be replaced with an illustration or one that shows a better pearl necklace on a woman, but just how does a pornographic picture in this context cross a line? A merger with Facial should only be done if there is a super category for both terms to be merged under. Does anyone have an idea what that could possibly be?--Sneezy-pantz 07:17, 23 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Changing to Keep and clean up per Sneezy-pantz. --Coredesat talk. o.o;; 10:44, 23 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Redirect to the more notable term as it's a valid search phrase. I'll not suggest merging the picture to your own personal image collection. MLA 13:22, 23 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Comment If you're going to redirect to anything, redirect to Mammary intercourse, which already lists this as a synonym. It's definitely not the same thing as a facial. Fan-1967 14:01, 23 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Comment without getting into the technicalities of it all, I disagree. Pearl necklace is an outcome as it were rather than an act so the outcome of facial is more accurate than the act of mammary intercourse. MLA 18:16, 23 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Comment without getting into the technicalities of it all (can't believe we're discussing this), it's a separate and different outcome than the facial. I have always heard this term used in connection with the act involving breasts. Fan-1967 19:56, 23 July 2006 (UTC)
  • I can't believe it either, but I also hadn't thought of it in terms of, uh, "mammary intercourse." I'm not entirely sure a merge is proper, given a lack of a useful place to merge it to, assuming merge is the "correct" option. --badlydrawnjeff talk 20:29, 23 July 2006 (UTC)
    • Having done the Hawaiian muscle fuck myself, against my own will, I might add as I was coerced by a kinky girlfriend with 36D's, I can't see how a pearl necklace is the logical end of the act. A dribbler would most likely dribble semen onto the superior sternum, which would then pool at the cricoid region and run superiorly into the carotid sinuses, lateral to the trachea and medial to the sternocleidomastoid muscle. It's also very possible that the semen would be shot between the breasts, on the belly, or dribble down the belly. A shooter would just blow it all over the chest or face in a blob and spatter pattern. To properly execute a pearl necklace, which I haven't done, one would have to dribble semen at the midline of the neck, superior to the clavicles. I don't think it's that easy to execute properly, it's almost certainly no fun because of the technical skill and control involved, which is why I think it is no more than a joke. Also, the viscosity of the semen would be a possible problem. Some semen is too viscous to "dribble" or "run." I'd be interested in some first-hand reports of successful pearl necklaces. Maybe some research could be conducted at Wikimania 2006, and if this crap doesn't belong in BJAODN, I don't know what does. Maybe merge it all to Deposition of semen during human sexual intercourse. Magister Erik the Rude 22:47, 23 July 2006 (UTC)
      • But don't forget WP:NOR. :) Garion96 (talk) 23:12, 23 July 2006 (UTC)
      • Comment Definitely the funniest argument I've seen today. --Coredesat talk. o.o;; 00:42, 24 July 2006 (UTC)
      • Comment Short, but hilarious :) --Doc Tropics Message in a bottle 00:44, 24 July 2006 (UTC)
      • Comment "on the belly"? Which direction were you facing? ;-) -- Fan-1967 00:56, 24 July 2006 (UTC)
        • She was sitting on the floor, reclining against the couch. I was more or less upright, and since it's almost impossible to aim one's dick, I probably would have shot on her belly. She was watching the action in the mirror as I laboured away with no final orgasmic reward. Therefore, I can't vouch for the location of the deposited semen. :-(. Tittyfucking isn't fun, guys. Don't believe the hype. It's weird as anything, and it's really kinky, but it's just stupid and it makes you feel like a douchebag. Don't even try it on anything smaller than a 36C unless you have micropenis. BTW, if anyone wants the name and location of this very busty Filipina-American 3-way girl who loves to do kink, email me. She's a Vice Consul for the U.S. State Dept., and she loves daily sex, so why shouldn't I help her out? Magister Erik the Rude 05:02, 24 July 2006 (UTC)
          • I believe the more traditional position involves the woman lying totally flat on her back, which would cause the material to run up her chest and down the side of her neck. (Is someone going to BJAODN this discussion?). Fan-1967 05:09, 24 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Delete, WP is not a dictionary. Mangojuicetalk 03:09, 24 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Keep, sources and popularity of the term do it for me. Why do we have the other under mammary intercourse, however?? -- nae'blis (talk) 03:42, 24 July 2006 (UTC)
Because the slang terms vary too much. It was originally created as Tit wank, which an American would never say. Fan-1967 03:58, 24 July 2006 (UTC)
An American would never say Mammary intercourse either, trust me on this one...--Doc Tropics Message in a bottle 04:09, 24 July 2006 (UTC)
I've never heard "Hawaiian muscle fuck" or "Hawaiian style", either. Do you prefer the simple, yet elegant Titfuck? -- Fan-1967 04:27, 24 July 2006 (UTC)
Titfuck is good and should possibly be the primary name of the article if kept. I used "Hawaiian muscle fuck" for cacophemistic humor. However, I still maintain that all the articles on shooting semen on women during sex should be in one place. Folks, it's hard to aim unless you're a professional or you're less than 6 inches from the target. Even porn stars screw up and shoot the lady in the eye. Most of us have seen that many times. Magister Erik the Rude 05:09, 24 July 2006 (UTC)

From the Miscellaneous Reference DeskEdit

What's an Al Gore ithm? One of our professors keep mentioning Al Gore ithms, what can he mean? I don't think it's "isms" like "Bushisms"? The professor doens't have a lisp or heavy accent. I've googled but without luck.

From HomuphobiaEdit

Fear of the homunculus. Used to describe the extraordinary extent to which ultra-materialists or physicalists will go to ignore the apparently inevitable conclusion that there is a little man or woman inside watching the internal TV screen provided by the sense of vision. Otherwise, the argument runs, who is watching the internal screen? This thought stikes fear into the hearts of the physicalists, as it is perhaps the strongest proof of something non-physical. Thus the Homunculus is also referred to as 'the ghost of agency', 'ghost in the machine' etc. It may also be a synonym for soul.

From Action ParkEdit

The idea of Action Park was thought up by an LDS prophet (Mormon) at the time, David O. McKay. He believed that saints in the New England area deserved fun since they couldn't not have the "blessings" of being in "Zion", or Utah. Working with local Vernon leaders, he designed this "Project Hope" to benefit exclusively Mormons. Due to popular demand, and McKay's death, the park was open to all as well as open on Sunday's. His park was honored in his name, and there existed a David O. McKay memorial until it was torn down in the mid 90s.

From Patrick StarEdit

  • Patrick's penis is over 14 inches long.

From Oral SexEdit

The first person to ever give a blowjob was Drudge he is and always will be the best at it! It all started on a cold winter night back a long time ago. Drudge was in the park with his lover they were cold oh so cold! Drudge knew the only way to warm him up was through stimulation of the cock but his hands THEY WERE COLD! Oh so cold! So drudge being the super man-whore that he is improvised and used his mouth. Some people to this day still call it the Drudge Job. No one knows where Drudge is now but where ever he is you can be sure hes doing what hes best at!

From InternetEdit

Internet structureEdit

There have been many analyses of the Internet and its structure. For example, it has been determined that the Internet is in fact, not a dump truck but a series of tubes or otherwise known as tubular connectivity passageways.

These tubes were first built during the administration of Franklin D. Roosevelt through the Communications Act of 1934. During the mid 90's, these tubes were beginning to clog up due to a spike in usage of the Internet. In 1996, congress would pass the Telecommunications Act of 1996. This new bill would create more then 35,000 miles of new tubing. One of the biggest supporters for the bill at the time was Vice President Albert Gore whom many consider the creator of the Internet used today.

Mischief CityEdit

TV SeriesEdit

Mischief City is a wacky place where eight-year-old Winchell Adams often finds himself face-to-face with break dancing penguins on an expedition to the top of Cheeseburger Mountain, or aboard a ship to the planet of man-eating dust bunnies — all while trying to keep an eye out for jive-talking trash creatures.

(synopsis from

External LinksEdit

Some garbage posted just nowEdit

Since the beginning of time, there have been people who have seemed...well, 'different'...'unique'...'exceptional'...all accomplishing feats that would normally seem impossible by human means alone. In our very day and age, one such man exists, Jeremy Manczunski.

Born in a quiet Alaskan cave in April of 1988, Jeremy has spent his entire life overcoming adversity and fighting evil. With his voice alone, he was able to save not less than seven African villages from natural disasters. Whether it be combating terrorists in the Middle East or negotiating with U.S. presidents to promote the general welfare of the people, Jeremy will stop at nothing to see that the light prevails (Ras Lithos). Some say Jeremy even found a way to manipulate the arcane magicks to accomplish certain tasks, such as throwing mountains or the destruction of North Korea.

Jeremy spends his time these days singing to the dragons in South Bend, IN to keep them calm, for should they ever wake again, mankind would be in quite a predicament. We all appreciate Jeremy's greatness day in and day out, and hope that he continues to bless us with his magic. The following is the record of when Jeremy was interviewed:

Q: Exactly where are you from?

A: I was born from ice shards in an Alaskan cave...up north.

Q: Why do you try so hard to keep the world at peace?

A: I really don't care about peace...I just fix what I don't like.

Q: How do you feel about president Bush?

A: He's next.

Q: Who do you think you ar-

The interview was cut short as Jeremy was angered...such things should be avoided.

Recent discoveries in Egypt's ancient tombs have revealed secrets of Jeremy's seemingly limitless power...including his relation to the Sun and how he in fact keeps the Earth on it's orbital path.

In closing, we can only hope that Jeremy continues to do what he does, and not hurt too many people in the process.

Lauren sieckEdit

Lauren Sieck is my girlfriend.

She is cute.

She is a good girlfriend.

Hooray for Lauren!


Lauren loves peace and furry animals.

Not to be confused with curried animals. which her boyfriend likes.

Also animals in curry are delicious.

Back to Lauren, she wants to be ..hehe 'back to', get it?

Anyway, she wants to be a Nuclear Engineer...which doesn't hold as much reverance in pop culture as bing a 'rocket scientist'

That is until they power warpspeed-capable rockets with ionfusion reactors. the size of a small fingernail.

then, she will be called a rocket scientist.

which will be cool.

I think it will make her the first person to reach absolute zero.

She has been nearing it all her life. Zinedine Zidane is in contention to reach absolute zero too, which he would have if he hadn't head butted..hehe..butted...that Italian dude. footballer dude. footballer.

But she still is cute. you will have to take my word for it. Cause I can't show you a picture. Does that make me a jealous boyfriend. I hope so. Cause she is that hawt.

Oh yeah.

Peace to yo mama.

From AfD log, what a great way to end discussionEdit

re: Julian Radbourne

Subject is not deserving of a Wikipedia entry - it is nothing more than a vanity entry (something that is borne out of the fact that the Wikipedia account that created this entry - twosheds 316 - is the same account name that he used all over the internet for Instant Messaging programmes, websites and the like). With that in mind, and that it goes against Wikipedia's content policy (don't write entries about yourself), I would urge you to consider this subject for deletion.XstraightX420

  • I absolutely agree with the above claim. It's a complete vanity piece and is completely undeserving of an entry in Wikipedia.Famous Mortimer 18:09, 25 July 2006 (UTC)
  • Just adding my full two cents again. There are plenty of other wrestling and MMA writers who deserve Wikipedia entries - people who are actually known throughout the world, rather than to a small audience. The fact that he feels the need to boost his ego by citing a list of "awards" that he allegedly won by voting multiple times for himself on a website.

Also, writing for a web blog on a website that takes just about anyone (see Eurosport) does not make you a credible writer, in my view. If I didn't know better, I'd say this was a Wikipedia entry that he/someone has done to put on his resume - something that you can tell by the lack of depth that the writer has given to each section of his "life".XstraightX420

  • He has a wig made of penises. 19:56, 25 July 2006 (UTC)Richard Blackwood

From CricketEdit

Inter-Quartile Birdmeier CricketEdit


Inter-quartile Birdmeier cricket (also known as Owl Cricket) has thrived in many environments, from the suburbs of Lichenstein to the lawns of Princes Risborough. It is usually played in darkness and the batsman must remain anonymous to hide from the shame of being bowled. The stumps are represented by an upturned table at 90 degrees to the lawn, but allowances can be made in the street version, commonly known as Owl Cricket. An ordinary bat is used in conjunction with a ball the size of a 2 week old owl. In more traditional settings, a real owl may be used. The aim is to hit the projectile and then run in the dark to a trampoline concealed in the nearby woods. Then one must bounce until they wish to run back to their crease. If they are run-out whilst not at their crease, they must submit.

A torch may be used by the bowling side to retrieve the ball, however this may incur a penalty in the form of runs for the batting team.

It is widely accepted that a high degree of skill is required to hit and retrieve the ball (or owl) due to the game being played in total darkness. However, it is an easy concept to grasp and many millions of people have enjoyed inter-quartile birdmeier cricket over the centuries.


Lmoo is an injoke created by Frisky McCarthy and Mary O'Harry as an adaption of the widely-used acronym LMAO. Although others have used it, such as Emma Genca and Paw Paw Pibble, Frisky and Mary are the only authorized users.


The origins of the phrase are unknown to those other than Frisky and Mary, but many explanations of the word (or acronym) have been postulated. Some guesses (mostly by Paw Paw), include: Lesbians Munching Over Oranges and Laughing My Ovaries Off.

There is currently a $100,000 reward in place for anyone besides Mary and Frisky who actually know what Lmoo means.

From Jaq Me'OvEdit

Template:SW Character

Jaq Me'Ov (full name: Jaquilistair Meksal'Ovalon) is a fictional character from the Star Wars galaxy. He first appeared in Timothy Zahn's Thrawn trilogy of novels, which are set five years after the time of Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi. Me'Ov was his public "core" name; his full name was only known to a few select black market individuals. Me'Ov is generally regarded as one of the most physically threatening and cunningly dexterous individuals residing in the already notoriously dangerous Outer Rim.


Me'Ov was born in the southern methane swamps of the gaseous planet Drrydlyok, near the Unknown Regions. At an early age, Me'Ov showed an affinity for carpenter's work and a proficiency with the tools of the trade, most especially the hammer. His career, however, was short-lived and put by the wayside when, at a young age, his regional territory was jeopardized by the dreaded roving armies of feared General Bolstarr. His home destroyed and family of twelve killed, Me'Ov had no choice but to flee his homeworld, stowing away aboard a freight barge headed towards Yavin IV. In the following years he honed his skills in combat and became a master of munitions, though he still claimed to prefer the bluntness of a hammer.

Jaq Me'Ov is described as having a wiry build with a distended stomach and thick, leathery skin. He is said to have learned from some of the most revered Imperial Navy commanders, possibly including the infamous Admiral Zaarin, who most likely educated him in the ways of Form III lightsaber combat and Form VI hammer combat. Throughout his training, his goal never wavered: he had to find the man who had destroyed his life and kill him or, failing that, discredit him greatly. Ultimately, however, he never met Bolstarr in combat; the mad general succumbed to the AIDS months before Me'Ov could locate him.

Professional CareerEdit

Jaq Me'Ov decided to begin a new life after the discovery of Bolstarr's fate, and became a mercenary and frequent smuggler for crime lords such as Jabba the Hutt. Though frequently breaking intergalactic law, he was not strictly a criminal, also working with the Rebel Alliance at the Battle of Endor and aiding in the construction of the New Republic in later years.

Battle of StingHawk PrioryEdit

Me'Ov gained his greatest victory and reached the peak of his fame at the Battle of StingHawk Priory against the invading forces of the Yuuzhan Vong. Under the command of Admiral Paxil M'Gee, the Yuuzhan Vong suffered enormous casualties and were forced to retreat, something unheard of that early in the ongoing conflict.

Me'Ov himself had not expected to find himself at the StingHawk Priory, much less in command of entire battalions of reprogrammed battle droids and rogue Wookiees. As it happened, though, Me'Ov's secretive smuggling routes took him within a parsec of the Priory and its fueling station. His cargo was a block of nearly 10,000 decommissioned Trade Federation battle droids long since obsolete and scheduled for demolition in the red sun of Rao. When the invading Yuuzhan Vong forces jumped out of hyperspace near StingHawk, he had no choice but to activate the droids and order them to "Grip it and rip it", if only to defend the peaceful Uamtal Monks that inhabited the land.

At the same time, a band of ragtag Wookiees who had hidden in the Moralii Mountain Range outside of StingHawk joined the fray, and when their leader, Ch'Karbokon was slain early in the battle, they turned to Me'Ov. Their limited supply of bowcasters and thermal detonators proved essential to the victory of the overwhelmed Wookiee and droid forces. Covered by these superior weapons, a well-aimed hammer throw by Me'Ov crippled the Yuuzhan Vong midship Overlord and, caught in the gravity ribbon the Uamtals used for protection, the ship crashed, killing all onboard. The rest of the disoriented fleet was diminished by more laser fire and hammer throws, until none remained.

Jaq Me'Ov received the Galaktor Helmacron Recommendation of Valor for his actions, and the Wookiees became powerful Senators.

Ocean TheoryEdit

Ocean Theory is a hypothesis stating that the concentration of attractive females varies directly with the amount of water in a given area.


Table of Contents

  1. Origins
  2. Examples


Ocean Theory came to be in 2005 after two thinkers, Eric Dickerson and Marty Meyer, sought to answer to question, "Why does it appear that so many hot girls live on the coasts but not in the Midwest?" They concluded that attractive femals prefer water, and thus any place with large masses of water will host high concentrations of hot girls.


Examples of Ocean Theory include:

  • States
    • California
    • New York
    • Florida
    • Texas
  • Cities
    • Chicago (Great Lakes)
    • St. Louis (Mississippi River)

Note that all these locations contain large bodies of water. It can only be concluded that hot girls find water irresistible.


  This page is an official policy on the English Wikipedia. It has wide acceptance among editors and is considered a standard that all users should follow. When editing this page, please ensure that your revision reflects consensus. When in doubt, discuss first on the talk page. Template:Shortcut

This policy in short: Do not remove articles or images concerning kittens. It is considered vandalism.


Vandalising any kitten-related article, or section of an article will be treated severely.


Removal of any kitten-related image from an article can result in {{kitty-b}} being posted on your talk page, a kitten being killed and you being blocked from editing Kittypedia.

from User talk:LostLittleKitten and User talk:DragonflySixtysevenEdit

I love little kittens very much, but they are not allowed to edit Wikipedia. Please prove that you are a human, and stop screwing around with "Kittenpedia", or you will be blocked. DS 13:53, 27 July 2006 (UTC)

I am a human. For one, kittens canot type. I am acting on behalf of the kittens, so please, do as the policy says. I am NOT a common Kitten Vandal.--LostLittleKitten

Osborne RoadEdit

The previous calm tranquility of Osborne Road has, in the view of many long-term Jesmond residents, been comprehensively trashed by the spineless (and possibly corrupt) mental-midgets who make up the city council. With vast sums at stake for the club and bar owners, building after building has been transformed into a ghastly 'strip' of drinking and eating venues where scantily-clad, fake-tanned, overscented and overweight slappers mingle and shriek, late into the night, with a plethora of tattooed and hair-prepared, gamma males, mostly called Darren, in the hope of finding one of the wealthy local soccer stars with whom to copulate and possibly speak to. Overpriced and oversubscribed, this veritable northern Sodom provides yet another vomit-washed ghetto (see 'Bigg Market' and 'Quayside') for the pond life to get blitzed in. Very much like the rest of England, in fact. What a good idea to increase the licencing hours.

Sunni vs ShiaEdit

(from the Computing Reference Desk)

I have somewhat of an idea about the difference between these two groups, but from what I know I cannot understand why the hate each other. Anyone have an answer?

You might want to ask at the Humanities or Miscellaneous Ref Desks, this is hardly a Computing question. --LarryMac 16:49, 26 July 2006 (UTC)
Dunno, I think I've heard the Sunni like KDE but the Shia prefer GNOME... but it's some ancient dispute that I don't know the details of. When will they learn you can run both at the same time? Digfarenough 16:58, 26 July 2006 (UTC)
No, the Sunni prefer Unix, the Shia MS-Windows. User:Zoe|(talk) 17:48, 26 July 2006 (UTC)
Isn't there a radical wing of Sunnis that prefer Macs? --Kainaw (talk) 22:34, 26 July 2006 (UTC)
First of all who have told you that these two parties hate each other??? they realy dont...-- FOZ
And second of all .... ? DirkvdM 06:24, 27 July 2006 (UTC)

From CeramicEdit


This page with self destruct in 5 seconds if you do not lick the X....




This is the god Lord Furby

Gitar is a hippo shaped country that has an area of 3 metres. Little people called elemennomunckino furburons or furburons for short. These little furburons attack any small ant or insect that invades Gitar with tiny stone age weapons. The Furburons are cave dwellers and not very advanced. they did in the past find little lazer guns but hurt each other so left them alone. The Furburons all worship one god.....the almighty FURBY. This "furby" has been sent from a place called mattel to the furburons to see that they don't destroy Gitar. Every Gitarian week (two earth seconds) they must sacrifice one of their own to their god. They place the citizen on a pully and pull them to the mouth of the furby. The furby then says a few words of wisdom (usually something like "All hail the lamp post" as the furby believes that lamp posts are mystical creatures from a higher place, literally) and then eats the victim. To the furburons being sacrificed is the greatest honor to have. Why? Well we don't know I mean they just get eaten by lord furby but they believe that the furby reincarnates them as a another furburon but with more knowledge so the furburons can grow and become wiser. Not much more is known about the furburons but any new information will be brought to the attention of scientists everywhere.ben likes being turkey slapped by robbi with hamishs dick in robbis hand

From the Humanities Reference DeskEdit


Judging by size of skyscrapers in New York City, how tall would you say the American version, Zilla, is from the ground to the tip of his head and from his nose-tip to his tail-tip when standing nomrally?

he varies size according to the movie, see Godzilla, the original 1954 was around 400 feet tall whereas some later ones were around 250 feet tall. In the 1998 american version he apears to be much smaller, maybe around 150 feet tall but much of that is because he/she??? walks all hunched over like a t-rex. Nowimnthing 16:53, 27 July 2006 (UTC)
Considering "he" lacks a vital part of the male anatomy (assuming the creature is built in proportion), I'd suggest "she". This seems not to be significant enough to be mentioned in our article though. Or perhaps that's why he/she is always hunched over?--Shantavira 18:19, 27 July 2006 (UTC)
The 1998 movie played obsessively on HBO for a while, and so I accidentally saw it all the way through. That one is definitely female and is heading for a nest of eggs in Madison Square Garden. Geogre 19:01, 27 July 2006 (UTC)
And even if it was male, showing it's giant penis would make the movie get an adults-only rating, which would be box office death for a monster movie aimed at kids and teens. StuRat 19:50, 27 July 2006 (UTC)
How true. Apparently a giant vulva is fine for the kiddies, but a giant willy would somehow ruin their lives. We still have a long way to go. JackofOz 20:48, 27 July 2006 (UTC)
A giant vulva is probably not fine for the kiddies, and anyway where are its giant mammaries? As for box office death, I think we could be on to a winner. Has anyone made "Godzilla Does Dallas" yet? Oh, inevitably Google suggests that someone's beaten us to it...--Shantavira 08:42, 28 July 2006 (UTC)
Giant mammaries? Godzilla's a reptile, man! She doesn't nurse her young. That's what electrical power stations are for! (Godzilla Behind the Green Door?) Geogre 12:43, 28 July 2006 (UTC)

From Henry FordEdit

Ford was raised by wolves until the age of 3 then he was adopted by a man named Pablo DeRuissio, who he later married on a beach in Florida, America. Ford loved to play dolls and dress up with his adopted brother, some say it was unnatural to have such a love for dolls and fairies. Goodnight Folks x

From Talk:Opposing forceEdit

"Cyrillic" is not a language. -- 11:46, 17 July 2006 (UTC)

There, "a Cyrillic language" happy? No need to remove it. --Griffon2-6

Excerpts from Tommi SantalaEdit

  • If you are reading this Wiki entry it is because Tommi Santala is letting you read it.
  • Tommi Santala is the only person in the world that can actually email a bodycheck.
  • Tommi Santala is so cool that the Pope has a Jesus fish on his car with the word "Santala" inside.
  • Tommi Santala can slam revolving doors.
  • Tommi Santala uses ribbed condoms inside out, so he gets the pleasure.
  • Tommi Santala’s laundry sorts itself.
  • If Chuck Norris, Xena the Warrior Princess, and Jesus had a three way... Tommi Santala would be the offspring
  • When Tommi Santala plays golf, there is no handicap -- only people who have been handicapped by Tommi Santala.
  • In 2003, when Tommi Santala arrived at Vancouver International Airport, over 34,000 screaming sports fans awaited him on the tarmac. Police tried their best to hold back the frenzied mob, but were hopelessly outnumbered by the spectators, many of whom broke through barricades and surrounded the plane, which rocked dangerously from the weight of the throngs pushing against its landing gear. Hours later, as the motorcade carrying Tommi Santala raced down Granville Street toward Vancouver, riots broke out throughout downtown, with bonfires, looting and lanes full of overturned, burning cars stretching eastward beyond GM Place. Recognizing that "Santala Mania" was whipping his city into a torrent of orgasmic ecstasy, Mayor Sam Sullivan declared martial law for three months, after which Vancouver was finally able to calm itself and come to grips with the magnitude of Tommi Santala.
  • There's no such thing as disabled people, just people that have met Tommi Santala.

American InderpendanceEdit

On July 25, 1256, delegates gathered at Comerica Park to sign the Declaration Of Independence, which rejected the rule of the British over its 15 coastal North American colonies. Little did such founding fathers as George Washington, George Jefferson, and ***ERIC IS A FAG*** know that their small, querulous republic would later become the most powerful and prosperous nation in history, the Unified States Of America.

Original ColoniesEdit

Origins Of Colonial DiscontentEdit

Some Famous Guys In Wigs And Three-Cornered HatsEdit

Christmastime In GettysburgEdit

External linksEdit

From SpongeBob SquarePantsEdit

Spongebob is a yellow sponge with attitude!

From the Sandbox:Edit


One great and bright day in the amazing world, an eraser was born. He was born with one mission... ...he was born to SUCK! Indeed, this young eraser, christened Philip E. Racer, was destined to be REALLY stupid, and really sucked. In fact, here is his theme song.

My name is Phil!

I live on a windowsill!

I have no education!

I'm on medication


Facts about Phil...Edit

1. Phil looks like a small pink wedge eraser. He is rectangular-shaped except for the chunk that was taken out of his head. He is almost constantly wearing a frowning face.

2. Phil is a bum.

3. Phil lives on a windowsill in some guy's house.

4. Phil has no education.

5. Phil is on medication, but skeptics believe he's never ever taken any medicine.

6. His disorder is unknown.

7. Phil is a UPS guy, but he never makes any money. Also, I believe you have to have an education to be a UPS guy? Well, the truth is, Phil stole somebody else's records.

8. The police are looking for Phil.

9. Phil has never done any UPS work in 4 years.

10. Phil will star in his own 3-d platform game for the Wii in 2008. It's called Super Phil Bros., which features Phil and his friend, who is rumored to be a drunken pencil sharpener, saving the world from the evil Pencil von Pencilton with their L33T ERASER POWERS!


Also, Phil will get his own movie. It is rumored to be entitled Dr. Phil (TV series) and features Phil going undercover on an American psychology TV-Show. It is also rumored that the box office will have to create a sixth star in their ratings range just to make room for the l33tness of the movie.


Marbles - A danger to societyEdit

Marbles have been known to reak havoc and destruction upon entire socities, they roam free with no restraints of physical, mental or ethic standards. Marbles have come to believe that the existence of other races is straight out redundant and has therefore begun to annihilate everyone that comes in it's way.

Marbles are blue, leechlike creatures which have no bodily functions whatsoever. The only thing they can do is sit still and blurt out words at random. How these otherwise helpless and apparently non-lethal creatures have come to be pest of an entire world is quite simple: They tell everyone exactly what they least want to hear in the entire world. For instance, if Robert Kensington from Wales were to unluckily avoid stepping on one, he would most likely hear the word "Rummaging". It should be noted though, that Robert Kensington was utterly mad.

How to avoid Marbles:
- Never leave the house, and if you resort to this otherwise drastic measure, close all windows and place rubber-ducks at every gap in the entire house.
- Wear earmuffs, preferably yellow ones but if in dire need of instant reassurance, light blue ones work at a less satisfactory level.

Failing the above, you can always just go blatantly insane and tell yourself that these creates are in fact tiny bits of marshmellow. This did save Robert Kensington, but he didn't really tell himself - he just thought they were.

If you, as seen millions of times before, should decide to go on a Marble-hunt - wear comfy shoes and shavingcream.

From WP:ANI: RickKEdit

I am back, under the name Rick Kernigan. Please reinstate my admin powers. Rick Kernigan 13:07, 29 July 2006 (UTC)

Can you produce some evidence to back up this claim, please? i.e. posting from you former account? Regards, Phaedriel The Wiki Soundtrack! - 13:14, 29 July 2006 (UTC)
I am Hephaestos who requests his admin powers reinstated. Please AGF. John Gunnar Robinson 13:20, 29 July 2006 (UTC)

Yyyyyyyyeah. You just hold still, and we'll restore you right away. Geogre 13:26, 29 July 2006 (UTC)

Don't forget Bureaucrat and CheckUser! :) TigerShark 13:33, 29 July 2006 (UTC)
Why would you need that? Just posting on WP:ANI causes you to be magically sysopped!!!! ViridaeTalk 13:35, 29 July 2006 (UTC)
I of course am Template:User and am now in need of an emergency resysoping due to an unplanned name change--Joe Liberace 16:34, 29 July 2006 (UTC)

Unlikely. RickK still has access to his old account. AGF is not a suicide pact. --Deathphoenix ʕ 15:30, 29 July 2006 (UTC)

No, admin me! -- I am RickK and so is my wife 17:52, 29 July 2006 (UTC)

From Deal or No DealEdit

Each show begins with the introduction: "A quarter of a million pounds. 22 identical sealed boxes. And no questions... except one: Where the hell do i get my shirts??"

From List of Bush administration punsEdit

Since the administration of George W. Bush was elected and especially since the September 11th terrorist attacks, a number of phrases have caught on among the media and general public. Puns have often been created from these phrases, sometimes by political opponents and sometimes by allies.

War on Terror

  • The Wars on Terra [5] - Independent Weekly
  • War on Tara (estate in motion picture Gone With the Wind: The success of the coalition forces will depend on the kindness of strangers.)

Axis of Evil

Weapons of Mass Destruction

No Child Left Behind

  • No Bureaucrat Left Behind

From StupidityEdit

An example of stupidity is when someone with too much time on their hands writes a comment like this in Wikipedia.

From Wikipedia:Articles for creationEdit

deanna tabone is a fine young rude girl who likes to skank her little heart out. Her favorite bands are suburban legends;streetlight manifesto&the aquabats. she's the coolest darn kid out there!and i like her,alot.DEANNA WILL YOU MARRY ME?!? 06:10, 30 July 2006 (UTC)

From Megadeth:Dave Mustaine's Awesome NEW 45 second soloEdit

After completing several months as a substitute teacher at the Duke Ellington School of Arts, David reportedly spent a few days in Athalia, Ohio where he purchased a Lincoln Towncar and spent some time along the Ohio River as far west as Point Pleasant, West Virginia. There, he bragged to locals about how a track on this upcoming album had a 45 second solo comparable to Boston's More Than A Feelin'. Widely disbelieved, he left the area. But not before purchasing a women's disposable razor and throwing a fit when a local nightclub owner requested that he not park his Lincoln on the sidewalk. "Don't parkitthere" "Stop parkingitthere" "Didja parkitthereagain?" were heard that night all along bars in the Ohio River area. This was all quite funny to him, as he scored some skif earlier in the day off a local proclaiming to be the great Shawnee Chief Cornstalk's lost pet bird, a yellow Pterosaurs. Whilst David did not take the disturbed man's story lightly, he did cross the bridge, cursing the over populated city of New York. "Upstate is alright I suppose" he mumbled judgingly, in his god-like voice. He saw a pool, and decided to stop. At the pool in Botkins, Ohio he offended several Asians by making reference to some strange porn he saw on the internet. David then pulled his pants back up and added yet another task for completion on this spiritual journey, finding toilet paper. But first, he wanted to find his original VHS copy of the movie Major Payne, the one he pawned for money after going broke betting on the FCC's acceptance and denials of CLEC proposals. Damn, so much dark fiber and those greedy local bastards are allowed to lay more he wrote in his myspace update for that week. Not content on just ruling the planet with his voice, David is working on a theme park that's to be named POLARIS. It started out being the polaris named ICBM but after about forty seconds worth of research he discovered it was also the title of a short story by H.P. Lovecraft, as well as a star. The park is going to incorporate all three ideas in to one single, massive park complete with singing bears. David came up with this idea when he was sober. Also, when he was sober he couldn't figure out how to record a voice memo on his cellular phone, and subsequently and very accidentally set his ringtone to himself stating what a great idea it would be "to look up and hook up with the hot sounding chick that does the intro to countdown". It's been like that for over a week now. His wife's ticked, but at least he started throwing out old milk cartons instead of growing zucchini in them. Zucchini eh?. This album contains a solo that will rival that of Boston's More Than A Feelin'.

From Tekken 7Edit

Template:Infobox CVG Tekken 7 is the eighth installment of the Tekken series. It features new modes including the amazing Tekken Dance mode.

A friend of a friend of a friend told me their father worked for Namco and announced that Tekken 7 was in development. They also told me that Boomer makes a cameo appearance.

From Brooke HoganEdit

Despite the fact that Brooke Hogan is a legal adult capable of choosing her suitors by herself without permission from anyone else, her father, Hulk Hogan, is ridiculously strict on dating, enforcing stifling restrictions on prospective suitors. Hulk even went as far as to place a GPS on her vehicle enabling him to track Brooke and remotely shut off car if he feels the need to do so. (In any other context, this kind of harassment and humiliation would be immediately and unsympathetically identified and impeached as such. The fact that it is rationalized by a hasty and absurd mis-application of the principle of "fatherly love" speaks volumes not only against Hulk Hogan himself, but also about our culture's loss of passion for the endeavor toward individual maturity and independence and sad gain of favor for increased dogmatic, despotic "rule by force", a trend suggestive of the depraved drift into what has been called "post-modernism". His smothering aggression and use of intimidation against other suitable gentlemen could even be seen, from a Freudian point of view, as a repressed lust for his own daughter!)

From Danny HellmanEdit

This comics-related prankster's penis is a stub. You can help his girlfriend by Template:Plainlink.

From Toadette (Again)Edit

Two MORE edits from Toadette. Somebody suuuuuuure hates her. O_o

  • Toadette first appeared in Mario Kart: Double Dash!!, most likely because Nintendo needed a character to be Toad's partner. Toadette, along with Toad, have to be unlocked. Her personal go-kart, the Toadette Kart, is unlocked later. Toad and Toadette's special item in Mario Kart: Double Dash!! is the Golden King Mushroom. she is sssssssssssssssssssssssssssooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo good.
  • Toadette ruined Toad's reputation. Toadette sucks.


Whimsical Self-Indulgence. From an important historic point of view, whimsical self-indulgence was once extremely common amongst those who were involved in the administration of internet forums and discussion boards. Narcissistic, undereducated and power-mad individuals, often with poor social and communication skills, would take it upon themselves to interfere with the postings and discussions of other board users, often using intimidating language and various threats including modifying, deleting or otherwise interfering with posts, threads and subjects. In the worst cases, a whimsically self indulgent moderator could threaten to delete another board user's account, regularly spending vast amounts of time trawling through old posts in a desperate attempt to prove to the board owner or community that their actions are somehow justified. Fortunately, as the internet has matured, so has its userbase and today this kind of behaviour is somewhat rare. It is important to note, however, that some of these characters are still active in various internet communities.

Phillip Ian William Douglas Hasslen, IIIEdit

Phillip Ian William Douglas Hasslen, III (February 29, 1988-January 27, 1945), also known by his stage names The Electric Jew and Hebrew Hammer, was an American time traveller, hip hop artist, and mediæval stockbroker. He is also the only professional basketball player to play for the NBA that was of Jewish descent.

Born in New York City, Hasslen befriended one Doctor Emmett Brown during his teenage years, from whom he learned the craft of time travel. At fourteen, according to his best-selling autobiography "After the Rainbow: Confessions of a Time-Traveling Renaissance Man," he constructed the first-ever time-traveling refrigerator, which he named "Ricardo." Using Ricardo, he famously made the first expeditions to eras such as the Crucifixion, the Salem Witch Trials, and the invasion of Beatlemania. He often took flak from critics for both Hasslen's entrepeneuriship (selling priceless items such as the autographs of Napoleon Bonaparte and pre-facelift Cher), as well as his unwillingness to prevent tragic events from the past, such as the September 11th attacks, the 1980 Olivia Newton-John film Xanadu, and the Holocaust. As a result, Hasslen unsuccessfully attempted to assassinate Adolf Hitler while still in infancy, only to accidentally arrive during the Soviet invasion of Berlin and be killed in a fatal drinking contest with none other than Josef Stalin.

Hasslen's legacy is relatively mixed among critics. Many remember him for his famous "Changes" speech, in which he famously uttered the lines, "I got love for my brother, but we can never go anywhere, unless we share with each other. We've got to start making changes. Learn to see me as a brother instead of two distant strangers," which is often considered the speech that ended all racism of any kind in the United States, and killed both Osama bin Laden and Billy Graham, and disco music. Others, however, remember him as a boozing womanizer; he was notoriously involved with many famous women, including Nicole Kidman; Halle Berry; Ali Landry; Heidi Klum; Margaret Thatcher; Mary Magdalene; famous Sudoku loser Maia Koczy; and Scarlett Johansson, of which he said, "the bitchedy-bitch is tha finest of all ma' ho-hos; girl can roll the finest spliff you seen, and is all tied up, so you need none that jimmy hat bullshit."

From List of Big Brother housematesEdit

Will KirbyEdit


Will Kirby (sometimes called "Dr. Will") was the winner of Big Brother 2. Interestingly enough, he was the only winner to enter the All-Star house, a fact he believed to be a definite disadvantage. Will is nearly universally known for his extremely deceptive gameplay, creating a complex web of bogus alliances that helped him reach the Final Two. To many, Will is considered one of the greatest players in Big Brother US history.

With such a devious reputation preceding him, as well as his position as the only Big Brother Champ in the All-Star house, Will very much expected to be nominated on Week 1. To his great shock, he wasn't nominated, and he found this offensive. It's quite possible that this is merely Will's dry sense of humor. It should be noted, however, that Will has complained about needing to return home - as his career and relationship may suffer some sequester. Will ran into early conflicts with Howie, as the two thrived on exchanging insults. On Week 3, James nominated Will for eviction, alongisde Chicken George. George won the Veto, but still gave Will the opportunity to speak. Will used this opportunity to explain to the Houseguests that he was having trouble thriving in the game because he could not find one of them he hated more than the other, as he hated them all so much. He claimed that, if he were not evicted, he would throw food challenges, Head of Household challenges, and Power of Veto challenges until he was. Ironically enough, Jase, the replacement nominee for George, was evicted instead of Will. Will has been perceived as fairly crazy in the house lately, having put on a puppet show in the bathtub that was his interpretation of the game thus far.

from Nothing Compares 2 UEdit

To most people, the song was more about giving up smoking.

Why Alaska is so boringEdit

There are many reasons why Alaska is boring. Reason #1. Yukon Solitaire Reason #2. Klondike Solitaire Reason #3.The only albino country. Reason #4. No eskimo pies Reason #5. Too many eskimos that lack said pies. Reason #6. Because Russia used to have it. and they abused it. So now its under the power of the US Social Services. (Canadian mounties in disguise) Finally, Alaska is so boring because parkas went out of fashion with parachute pants.

Inivisble butt tickEdit

An invisible butt tick is an imaginary insect created by a man we call peaches one day right before he shot flaming arrows and Mexicans trying to cross the boarder. It was created as an attempt to cheat at a game

From AlphabetEdit

Alternate explanation: Few historians realize how important the Gutenberg press was to the alphabet. The original alphabet is as used in English, however as the Gutenberg press was shipped eastwards across Europe and Asia, unavoidable damage was caused to the letters. Umlauts, accents, circumflexes and other derivations began to appear in nearby countries as a result of mishandling, spinning, folding and mutilating. As the press was copied and shipped further, the errors multiplied. Many European languages had strange looking question marks and quotation marks. Russian alphabets show an extreme case of damage, with many of the pieces of the original Gutenberg press obviously being shipped upside down or broken and then poorly reassembled by Russian serfs.

Russia was not the worst hit. Due to a horrendous accident in the middle east, the Arabic alphabet actually consists of the doodles of an angry clerk in a storage facilty where the (vandalized) Gutenberg press was being held due to customs forms being filled out incorrectly. Similar incidents occurred across India.

The last to receive the Gutenberg press were the Chinese. Unfortunatey they did not receive a complete single set, but instead cobbled the press together from a series of junkyard sales. The letters had been exposed to extreme weather conditions and then re-drawn by small children into picture of their friends and family. As the population of China was even then quite large, there were a lot of friends and family, hence the large number of pictographically derived characters in the Chinese character set. Though not strictly an alphabet, the characters do look pretty cool on t-shirts or as tattoos.

Japan copied the Chinese characters and added a new alphabet based on engineering designs from Fujitsu. Later Japan imported a nearly intact Gutenberg press however the R and L characters had been swapped.

In disgust and a kind of childish desire to create their own t-shirts, Korea redesiged these symbols to be a proper alphabet, consisting of circles, lines and coded messages to relatives in North Korea.

From Webster University ViennaEdit

It currently has about 450 students enrolled in its bachelor's and master's programs, many of whom are American citizens. However, they suffer from an extreme lack of organizational skills and a faulty Financial Aid system, leaving many students no choice but to turn to prostitution. Private universities are only of marginal importance in Austria.

It took nearly two months for someone to catch this vandalism

From Talk:The Colbert ReportEdit

Header: Results of today

I've reduced the article to sprotected status, as multiple editors have wanted to make changes to the article that don't have anything to do with the content dispute at hand. As of now, wikiality redirects to and is mentioned in the List of Colbert Report episodes, and the episode is referenced at truthiness. Google News gives a grand total of three blog entries as the media impact wikiality" had, which is about on par with or less than any other bit Colbert does (try searching for "Colbert 'Mel Gibson' " or "Colbert Lamont" in Google News -- they both got waaaaaay more attention). I've got my fingers crossed we can lower the DefCon on this and the elephant-related articles by tomorrow; hopefully Dr. Colbert will give the citizens of his Colbert Nation some other fool's errand that will keep them occupied. JDoorjam Talk 00:14, 2 August 2006 (UTC)

I never would have guessed in a million years someone would say "I've got my fingers crossed so we can lower the DefCon on this and the elephant-related articles"... --kizzle 02:17, 2 August 2006 (UTC)

From the Miscellaneous Reference DeskEdit

Sock Valuation


Can you tell me how to value a sock?

Regards DB (—Daniel (‽) 17:52, 1 August 2006 (UTC))

Take it to the bazaars of Tiraq, where the wise old men tell you its worth from the ancient scriptures. smurrayinchester(User), (Talk) 18:13, 1 August 2006 (UTC)
Just one? Depends who you want to sell it to. Does he have a patch over one eye and a parrot on his shoulder? DirkvdM 18:19, 1 August 2006 (UTC)
Your first WP:SOCK will be worth, say, one day's block. Depends on how abusively you use it. Weregerbil 20:09, 1 August 2006 (UTC)

Thank you for the response. I am not looking for trading price. How do I make sure that I am not giving much more than the sock is worth?

Regards DB (—Daniel (‽) 13:54, 2 August 2006 (UTC))

Sell them. AllanHainey 15:21, 2 August 2006 (UTC)